Dear Rush, I Understand You're Having Trouble With Women

I heard yesterday on the news that Rush Limbaugh was thinking about having a summit to figure out why women don’t like him. My first thought was WOW… how do I get invited to that! And then my marketing mind went to work and after looking at Rush’s conundrum through the marketing to women filter, I thought a quick note might be just as effective. Besides, I don’t believe he really wants to hear what I have to say anyway… and that is part of the problem.

 Dear Rush:

 The news yesterday was all over the fact that you were trying to figure out why about two thirds of the women in this country don’t like you and that you were thinking about having a summit to try and figure out why. Well, I don’t know about you, but I’m really trying to watch my budget these days, so I thought instead of wasting all that time and money on a summit, I’d just give you a clue. And I have three for you.

 The first is, you are unauthentic. Women see through that like you were a pair of sheer panty hose. People who are successful with the woman audience are genuine and true to their beliefs. The most successful women broadcaster in history is Oprah. And why do we love her? Because she’s authentic. She’s fat, she’s thin and she shares her struggle. She was abused, fought through the glass ceiling, had sexist bosses, has problems with love… and she shares it all. When she makes a mistake, she owns it right away. When you admitted after the 2006 elections that you were carrying water (I believe those were your words) for people you didn’t believe in, you lost any credibility you had. Listening to you, you cannot possibly believe the stuff you say everyday. And right now, our lives are too important to get caught up in your drama and points to “create excitement.” We want solutions, not finger pointing.

 The second point, you are the bully on the playground we all avoided. Women prefer solutions, to name calling. Consensus to “it’s us against them.” We hate being told we’re stupid if we don’t agree. We are the peacemakers of our families and have no time for those who only want to stand on the sideline and call people names. When you said you wanted our President to fail, that was the last straw for every woman I know, Democrat or Republican. You see, if the President fails, we all fail. We worry about having enough money to retire, to put our children through college and taking care of our parents when they get old. Failure is not an option. Women thrive on positive thinking and knowing that if we all work together, that is how we win. We teach it to our children everyday, so we don’t need you trying to scare us into believing in whatever message you’re trying to sell that day.

 And thirdly, I really don’t think you even like women. And I am pretty sure that if you want women to listen to you, calling us names like Femi-Nazi isn’t a really good plan. You see, I was born on the cusp of the real change in women’s rights. I was a freshman in high school when Title 9 was passed. Not that my school paid too much attention, but at least we had real sports teams and got to play against other schools. We only had one set of uniforms so the basketball team and the gymnastics team couldn’t have a game on the same night. And the boys got box lunches for road games and we had to stop at McDonalds and buy our own dinner, but most of the time, things were pretty even.

 I even got my first radio job because of EEOC requirements. I got to do the all night show at WMEE in Fort Wayne Indiana for $100 a week because they had to have a woman on the air, and I just happened to walk into the program director’s office on the right day. I fought for equality in pay and eventually, made as much as the guy who was there before me. I had to fight off the advances of the men I worked with, listen to their sexist remarks and even have promotions built around double entendre jokes like “Go To Bed With Diane.” Boy did that make my parents proud. But I survived it and made a path so the women who came after me had a much more equal path.

 It’s still not equal but it’s sure a lot better than it was. And it was because of the Femi-Nazis that some young woman now can walk into a radio station, get a job and not have to deal with the same discrimination I did.

 So, perhaps, and it’s just my gut feeling, but if you want to appeal to women, understand our struggle. Understand that even today, the pay gap between men and women is still too large. That we’re concerned about how our children are educated and if they have health insurance, and that our bodies are our private property and only we should decide what happens to us. Walk a few steps in our shoes, and then maybe you might understand why we really don’t identify with what you’re saying on the radio.

But I tell that to any broadcaster who is trying to appeal to women. Be authentic, make sure that what you’re talking about rings true in a woman’s world, and most of all, understand our concerns are big picture. Women are the caretakers of the family. We have to manage the big picture. And if you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the problem. And right now, from where I sit, you’re part of the problem.

 Best regards and I hope this solves your confusion. But my guess is nothing will change, because you’re not authentic in really wanting it to change. It’s just another stunt, which takes me back to the first paragraph. And thus the circle continues.

Diane

 

Comments

[Jennifer McDonald]

Never have truer words been spoken! Right on... and thanks for paving the way for us.